Shark in the Water
by BlossomsOfSorrow
Summary: Suigetsu is lusting after Kisame's sword, but he can never seem to acheive his goal of taking it from the shark man. This time Suigetsu has a plan. A real plan. Will it work, and what happens if his plan backfires? Slight Yaoi. Innapropriate Language.


**Hey all. I feel like I should warn you that this is my first fic, so I apologize in advance if I screwed something up. Feel free to leave a review or send me a message telling me what I did wrong and I will try to fix it A.S.A.P. If you just want to criticize my work, feel free to do that too. The more critical the better. I could always use a little constructive criticism to help make me a better writer. **

**This is a short one-shot about Suigetsu and Kisame. It is set in the time after team Hebi changes it's name to Taka, and during the time that we don't get to see them until they are fighting the eight-tails. I was sad when Kisame committed suicide, so I figured he should at least get some before he died. xD**

**Warnings: This does contain some slight Yaoi. That means Boy x boy. It's rated T for a reason. These reasons would be suggestive themes and insulting language. (a.k.a. Cussing) You have been warned.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or it's characters. I asked Masashi Kishimoto if he would give them to me for my birthday, but he said no. TT_TT**

_/\_\o/_

Today was the day.

Suigetsu grabbed his cup of water from the table of the conference room and followed the others out the door.

Tobi, whom they had just learned was actually Madara Uchiha, had just finished convincing Sasuke to join him and the Akatsuki in capturing the jinchurikis and sucking the Bijuu out of them, killing them in the process. Being a member of team Taka, Suigetsu really had no choice but to comply with Sasuke's orders, seeing as how he was their leader and all.

Besides, it's not like Suigetsu had anything better to do. He supposed he could stick around for a while, especially if it meant getting his hands on his good old senpai's sword.

Samehada was such an amazing weapon, that bastard Kisame Hoshigaki didn't deserve to even be in it's presence, much less call it his _own. _The thought alone was sickening to Suigetsu, but today that all would change.

Oh yes, because today Suigetsu had an idiot proof plan. One that would surely get him close enough to Samehada so that he could take it easily. Today, Samehada would be his.

The ninjas parted ways. Sasuke going off alone, as usual, with Karin trying to follow him until a cold glare froze her in place until the angry raven turned away again and she decided to turn around and head to her room with a huff, Juugo was probably going to go talk to some animals or something, and that freakin' weird Madara guy just standing there, staring at them with his visible eye – which seemed to be following Kisame's ass.

Suigetsu shook his head to clear the disturbing thoughts and he opted to trail behind Kisame wherever he may lead, hoping to get him alone for a few minutes so he could put his plan into action.

Suigetsu was surprised when the larger blue male didn't even acknowledge his presence, it wasn't exactly like he was trying to be stealthy or anything, so he was positive the other knew he was tailing him. Didn't he?

The shark man stomped into his room and slammed the door behind him, causing it to hit the door frame with a little too much force and bounce back open, leaving it slightly ajar. Suigetsu was thankful for this because it made it easier for him to slip in unnoticed, since it appeared he hadn't been discovered yet.

The young boy entered the room just in time to see Kisame strip off his Akatsuki cloak, revealing his black and white pants and a well worn white wife beater. Suigetsu had to hand it to the shark, he had a killer body. Finely toned muscles were outlined by the tight fabric of the shirt, which was damp with sweat from the hot red and black cloak he had just relieved himself of. Upon closer inspection, Suigetsu noticed what could only be described as small fins protruding from Kisame's spine and arms.

The big blue man was hot in an oddly animalistic way. One that caught Suigetsu's attention.

Kisame threw his Akatsuki cloak aside, causing it to land on the back of the chair beside his bed, and he propped Samehada _lovingly_ against the wall before slumping down on his bed – back facing the door – and running a hand over his unnaturally colored face, sighing.

It had been a long week. First the whole thing with Itachi dying, then finding out that annoying Tobi was, in fact, Madara Uchiha, the former Mizukage of the Hidden Mist, and then convincing Sasuke and his team of misfits to join their ranks.

Kisame snorted. _As if we actually need those snot-nosed brats. _

He knew they were running low on members, and not many people fit the profile Akatsuki was looking for but damn, he didn't think they were _that_ desperate. Sasuke he could understand, because he held the same Sharingan as Madara and he knew Madara had special plans for him, but the others...? Come on. They weren't worth the air they breathed. _Especially not that arrogant fish stick, Suigetsu, _his subconscious added.

A loud slurping sound alerted him to the other presence in the room and he spun his head around to see what had caused the disturbance. There, leaning against his door frame was said arrogant fish stick, sipping out of that damn cup he was always carrying around.

The slurping sound was causing Kisame's already pounding headache to become a massive migraine and he just barely bit back a yell. "What are you doing here, you little twerp? Back for a rematch? Because I think we all know who will win."

Pissed off, but not shocked by the comment, Suigetsu kept his calm demeanor. He knew quite well that he couldn't take on Kisame when he wielded Samehada, and he also knew that the only way to obtain the magnificent sword was to kill it's owner. However, Suigetsu had a theory.

He had not long ago discovered that the first owner and original creator of the Samehada was not in fact killed, but instead died of old age, and had some years earlier passed the sword on to his apprentice after he had finished training under him.

This got Suigetsu thinking...

What if, hypothetically speaking, he could get his sharky senpai to _give _Samehada to him? He knew it was far fetched, but that's where his "plan" came in.

"Nah, I just wanted to come and see my favorite senpai. Is that illegal?" Suigetsu said nonchalantly as he pushed away from the door frame and headed towards the older of them.

"It should be." Kisame huffed out, not sure where this was going, but he knew he probably wouldn't like it.

"Aw. Don't be like that Kisame-senpai." The boy ran his hand over Samehada and Kisame felt his eyebrow twitch. Suigetsu smirked, having left his own sword in the room he was currently staying the night in with Juugo, ensuring it was safe. Although, he doubted Kisame would care for it anyways. "I just wanted to congratulate you on how well you faired in our little match." He turned so that he was standing directly in front of the distraught blue man and slowly ran his fingers over his arm. "I was really impressed."

If Kisame was a lesser man he would have flinched, but being the Monster of the Hidden Mist, he held his ground and leveled the white-haired fish stick with a piercing gaze.

Even as the shark in front of him sent him a glare so heated it could easily cause him to evaporate, Suigetsu could only smirk as he leaned down face to face with the older man, resting his free hand on the others thigh, seemingly for support so he wouldn't fall into him when he leaned so close. "And I was wondering," he said in a seductive voice, "if you could show me some of your other abilities."

That's when a very skilled hand slid up his thigh to massage Kisame's manhood through his pants causing it to harden.

Kisame stiffened and grabbed Suigetsu's wrist in order to bring a halt to the undesired attention of his growing erection, but the white-haired cock tease just grabbed him by the shoulders and sat on his lap with both legs on either side of the disgruntled shark. Then, he ran his hands sensually down the strong arms and grabbed both by the wrists, pinning them down to the bed beneath them.

Suigetsu then leaned forward where his lips were pressed against a blue ear. "Oh, just loosen up a bit senpai." He whispered as he used one of his legs to restrain the other man's left hand and used his now available hand to begin stroking the growing length once more. "It's not going to kill you to have some fun once in a while." He licked the shell of the larger man's ear, earning a deep grunt, before pulling away to brush his lips over the surprisingly smooth skin of Kisame's face.

He smirked against Kisame's cheek when he felt him relax beneath him, thrusting his hips up slightly into the heavenly touch of the pale hand. He released both of Kisame's arms and both blue hands immediately found purchase on the teen's plump ass.

Suigetsu let out a small startled yelp, but shortly after his smirk returned ten-fold. He had correctly pegged Kisame to be the dominant one. He had come to this conclusion not only because he wasted no time in cupping his ass cheeks, but because that small, and dare he say girly, yelp went straight to his senpai's dick. Hardening it to a painful extent.

Suigetsu sat up straight on the strong lap, smirk still plastered on his face as he looked Kisame straight in the eye and grabbed him by the shoulders once pushed down onto the man beneath him's crotch with his own, grinding them together.

Suigetsu threw his head back and moaned erotically as Kisame kneaded the fleshy globes of his ass with his strong hands. Kisame grunted. He was painfully aroused and he could feel his erection chafing against the black fabric restraining it. It was already begging to be set free.

Kisame cursed his eagerness. He hadn't had sex in months. He needed his release and he needed it _now._

Obviously, Suigetsu could sense his desperation, because he pressed his hips down harder and moaned again. "Ah, senpai! I want your big, long sword and I want it now!"

Kisame groaned. Apparently, Suigetsu wanted this just as badly as he did and it was turning him on beyond belief. He squeezed his eyes shut and thrust his hips upwards into the white-haired male above him. He seemed to be just as hard as he.

Suigetsu bit back a moan when he felt Kisame's erection colliding with his own. If he didn't finish this soon, _he_ was going to be the one leaving here looking like an idiot.

He forced himself to calm down. He was painfully erect, but he could take care of that later, right now he just needed Kisame to agree to give him Samehada. Then, the only way the other could get it back would be to kill him, and there was no way that Suigetsu was going to let that happen.

He continued his mannerisms.

"Please, _please_, Kisame-senpai! I want your equipment! Please! Give it to me!" He moaned out wantonly. "I _need _it!"

For Kisame, that was the straw that broke the camels back. He was so lost in pleasure, he just wanted to be inside the perfect ebony body above him. He just wanted his release, no matter what it took. "Yes!" He groaned out out of sheer pleasure and frustration and thrust his hips upwards once again.

All at once, Suigetsu's movements ceased. Kisame opened his eyes to see what was going on, when he was met with Suigetsu's face staring right at his.

The teen's purple eyes were full of hope and he looked at his senpai with a serious face.

"Really?" he asked incredulously, "I can have it?"

Kisame was so confused. Was he asking if he wanted to have sex with him? What a stupid question to ask. A painful throbbing between his legs snapped him out of his thoughts, reminding him of his arousal.

"Yes...?" he answered, unsure of himself.

Suigetsu beamed and jumped out of Kisame's lap. "Yay!" he left the distraught shark on the bed and skipped giddily over to Samehada. He began stroking it lovingly, leaning his face in to run across the bandaged shark-skin blade.

He heard the creaking of the bed behind him and knew that Kisame had probably moved to stand. He inched away from the sword preparing to rise to his feet and prepare for the battle that was likely to ensue, but was distracted from doing this when one of the scales from the blade poked out from beneath the bandages and scratched against his face, the shark skin taking out a large chunk of his watery shell and causing the water to fall to the ground, creating a small puddle.

The white-haired teen slowly brought his hand to his cheek and winced when he could feel the absence of flesh beneath his fingers. It didn't hurt, but being without part of his body always grossed him out a little bit.

The puddle from the floor moved back into his body, entering through his feet, and the hole in his face was quickly regenerated to looking good as new. Sometimes he almost wanted to thank Orochimaru for performing those experiments on him. Although they were painful, they did him a lot of good.

Still crouching on the ground, he turned to look at the weapon next to him, in order to understand what the hell had just happened. He saw that shark skin scales were sticking out from all over Samehada, tearing the bandages and deforming the handle.

Suigetsu, who had been a good boy and done his research, knew this to be the sword's defense mechanism against those whom the weapon did not belong to, but he was really hoping he was wrong about that.

In order to test his suspicion, he placed his hand on an empty space on the blade. He pulled his hand away just in time to avoid it being impaled by a rough scale of the sword. The sudden movement shocked him and he fell backwards from where he was crouching unsteadily on the ground, landing unceremoniously on his ass.

Suigetsu fumed. How was this possible? His plan was idiot proof! There's no way he could have been wrong about his theory. Could he have? Of course there wasn't any _proof_ or anything to back up his theory, but that didn't mean it was wrong. Right?

The white-haired boy slumped where he sat and stared at the floor, pouting. Apparently, it did mean he was wrong, because his plan obviously hadn't worked out too well for him.

_Great, _he sighed. Not only had his plan not worked but that damn sword had drained him of all of his chakra. Oh well, he might as well go to his room and sleep it off. He could try again tomorrow anyways.

"Suigetsu." A low, angry sounding growl from above him snapped Suigetsu out of his thoughts and he looked up to see an enormously peeved shark hovering over him at his full height.

Kisame looked upon the teen with a predatory glint in his colorless eyes, his tiny pupils focused on the white-haired idiot in front of him. He was pissed off now, and that snot-nosed brat was going to finish what he started.

Suigetsu winced when he noticed the dangerously large tent popping in the other's pants. His own erection had deflated somewhat when he was attacked by Samehada, but for the most part it was still alive.

He knew this wasn't going to end well for him. Being as low as he was on chakra, he had no chance of fighting, and as far as escape went, he seriously doubted melting into a puddle of water would be a smart idea. Kisame would probably just scoop him up into some jar or something and keep him on his shelf anyways. He _really_ didn't want to spend the rest of his life in Kisame's room. Who knows what kind of gross stuff he would see.

The shark stepped closer to where the boy sat and Suigetsu put his hands in front of himself, as if preparing to be attacked. "Now, now senpai. Let's talk about this. I'm sure we can work this out."

The massive blue man wasn't listening. He just stepped closer, his mind set on one goal and one alone. Suigetsu was seriously freaking out now. He didn't dare think about what his senpai was going to do to him. "No need to be hasty. Senpai? Kisame-senpai, are you listening to me?"

The shark attacked him.

"Kisame-senpai!"

_/\_\o/_

The next morning, the other three members of team Taka were gathered at their designated meeting place, waiting for their final ally to show up.

Suigetsu was already over an hour late and had disappeared the night before, leaving the rest of them wondering where the arrogant fish stick had gotten off to.

"Damn it!" Karin spoke up first. She couldn't take it anymore. That white-haired terror was always so damn slow and worthless, and Sasuke had been rejecting her advances all morning. She just wanted to get a move on already so that they could find this damn Hachibi Jinchuriki and capture him so that she could prove how strong she was to Sasuke and make him love her, dammit! Was that so hard to understand?

"Where is that lazy idiot!" she exclaimed and then moved to look at Sasuke, putting on her "sweet face" as the other members of Taka liked to call it. She grabbed his arm and tried to convince him in a sweet and seductive voice. "Sasuke-kun. We should really just leave him here. He's not any use to us. He's probably dead anyways."

"I heard that."

All three members of Taka turned to see a very disheveled Suigetsu walking towards them slowly, favoring his ass with the way he waddled up to the group.

Karin detached herself unwillingly from Sasuke's arm and put both hands on her hips as she moved to scold her white-haired teammate.

"Might as well be." she said in a commanding voice. "What the hell took you so long?"

She paused as she noticed said teammates odd behavior, "And why are you limping?"

Suigetsu scowled at her, "I don't see how that's any of your business." He grabbed his sword from Juugo, who had brought it with him because Suigetsu hadn't showed up to their room to pick it up, and walked past the other members of Taka, heading off in the direction of Kumogakure. "Now can we please get going? I'd like to finish our mission some time this week."

Karin gaped as the other member of team Taka just followed the grumpy ninja as stoically as always. She crossed her arms over her chest and huffed. "Like you're one to talk. We've been waiting for _you_ this whole time." She mumbled to herself as she trailed behind the others, still pouting.

In the distance Kisame and Madara could be seen watching the four shinobi as they left on their mission. Kisame was smirking at the way Suigetsu walked as he argued with an angry Karin, and recalled the events of the previous night, making him smirk even wider.

Madara turned to his old friend and looked upon him. His emotionless expression covered by his mask.

"What did you do to the poor boy?" the question came from out of nowhere, but it didn't shock Kisame in the slightest. He just continued staring at Sasuke's team as he broke a toothy grin.

"Oh, I just taught him a lesson he'll never forget." his sharp teeth glistened in the sun as he chuckled in amusement.

Madara turned back to stare into the distant forest that the four teens were disappearing into and narrowed his eyes dangerously at the retreating back of the white-haired boy. He wasn't stupid. He knew that Kisame had no doubt stuck _his_ "fish stick" into _that fish stick_!

How could he get so lucky? That bastard didn't deserve Kisame!" Madara sighed. He knew it wasn't Suigetsu's fault and it was probably against the poor boy's will, but still. He felt jealousy bubbling up in his chest. He wished his blue friend would teach _him_ a lesson he would never forget.

Maybe _he_ should try stealing Samehada sometime...

_/\_\o/_

**Wondering about the whole Madara x Kisame thing? I honestly think they're a cute pair and it's totally not crack... well, it kinda is. But in the end of the Itachi Pursuit arc Tobi reveals himself to be Madara to Kisame and says something akin to; "I'm sorry I had to hide this from you since you're my closest person." So yeah, that's where I got it. In case you were wondering. ^_^**

**So there it was. Thanks so much for reading. If I screwed up on something please let me know. I will try to respond to all reviews, requests, or suggestions.**

**You may not know because this is my first fic, but I will usually use the ruler option. I just decided to do something special for this fic. ^_^ However, the FanFiction Document saver thingy was being dumb and not letting me do what I wanted, so I had to settle with what I got. :/ **

**It looked so cool too! TT_TT**


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